SUICIDE COMMANDO

DNA Lounge | San Francisco
October 19, 2025

Setlist Highlights

  • “The Gates of Oblivion”

  • “God Is in the Rain”

  • “I’d Die for You”

  • “Cause of Death: Suicide”

  • “Hellraiser”

  • ”We Are Transitory”

Themes like suicide, pain, grief, and loss become more comprehensive, tangible, human… I felt seen. Understood.

I’m still buzzing.

Suicide Commando was hands down the best concert I’ve been to in years. I walked out with a feeling of a full body workout, half-deaf, and yet fully alive. The entire experience took me 20 years back in time, when I was a teenager, attending friends’ concerts in the front row. It was the kind of night where you lose track of time, your body just moves on instinct, and every bass pound feels like a heartbeat.

I’ve loved Suicide Commando for years, but didn’t expect it to hit like this. Right out of the gate - “The Gates of Oblivion”, to be exact, the band had the entire room in their grip. WELCOME - and you do indeed feel welcome. OK - and you think “yes, perhaps everything will be ok.” Johan Van Roy’s stage presence is magnetic:  intense, but deeply human. The way he interacts with the crowd, the raw emotion in his facial expressions, the way he moves - it’s not just performance. It’s immersion.

The Void

The moment Johan stepped on stage, everything shifted. The crowd erupted, and it wasn’t chaos - it was a vibe that pulsated through the crowd without skipping a beat. There’s something almost spiritual about how he channels darkness into something healing. Themes like suicide, pain, grief, and loss become more comprehensive, tangible, human… I felt seen. Understood. And perhaps, a little more balanced. All this so seamlessly aligns with my personal brand of Morbid Optimism, aka staying open to anything, while also being ready for anything. A good friend of mine used to say “It’s like knowing you might have a headache, and having Tylenol in your drawer.”

Through the entire set (and it wasn’t short either) I danced, moved, jumped - while also following along with the lyrics. Really feeling alive. A decent part of Forest of the Impaled was in the setlist, which created a perfect cushion for grittier, faster-paced tracks in the middle.

At one point, Johan jumped into the crowd right next to me. We were all moving together, hands in the air, feet.. Somehow not clashing with others. Most of the time. 

Towards the end,  the band stepped off stage with a backdrop of still-riled up audience wanting more. And then they were, all three, on the stage again.  

Insert: Johan moves back to the stage, I’m in the second row, and with a swift motion, I’m now in the first row. Holding on. Headbanging. Vibrating.

There was a shouting-the-lyrics moment. A fist-bump moment. A few selfies. Togetherness. 

What touched my heart was Johan's kindness to pause for a photo. With a fast-paced set like that, it wasn’t a default! And yet, he saw my struggles to capture stillness, and joined in. A gesture I’ll never forget.

And then, another moment hit me like an avalance: a coveted Suicide Commando drumstick, gifted by the band’s drummer, Mario Vaerewijck. It felt like a ritual, a perfect capsule of all the energy exchanged that night, in its still form. I was melting from the heat and emotional overload, with this scratched stick in my hands. People nearby cheered on, and took some photos of me with another fan who got the second stick.

When I was about to leave, I sat down on stage, enjoying the still-pulsating surface as low bass was filling the space. Crews were packing the equipment, DJs were wrapping up. Mario came close and sat down next to me to chat about life, death, music, projects, and what it all means. A real conversation. No filters or theatrics. And, a really good photo in the end.

The Meltdown

When it was all really over, the lights came on and most of us bats were squinting, not ready to leave. I had to go eventually because of an early meeting the next day. On my way out, I chatted with a few people from the show, and we exchanged photos. And then, there was Johan.

No rock star attitude, no ego. Just genuine realness. Empathy. I told him how much I appreciated his and the band’s work, their message, their energy, and giving back to the world. How it feels healing despite the thematics. Then, we took some photos (with consent, of course!) - and these felt like a hug.

It’s those moments that stay with you long after the music stops.

** All content and edits by Olga Gabris.

The Aftermath

By the time I stepped outside, the cool air was so welcome. I was half-delirious and truly happy. There’s something magical about a show that shakes you out of your everyday life and drops you right into your body again. 

And maybe that’s why it hit me so hard. It wasn’t just nostalgia for the front-row wilderness and chaos - it was a reminder that being present matters. We matter. Of how precious life is, with the limited time we have on this planet.

Now, every time I stretch for a Commando plank during a workout, I’ll always fall back into this memory of being seen, welcome, and alive.